Choose Dignity ....
not Drama ~ Your future is watching ~ |
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"Do things that suggest you have an important agenda, a strong work ethic or an obligation to care for your family (maybe set an alarm or choose tomorrow's wardrobe), and your subconscious mind will understand your need to get moving...... Act like you're sick or say "I feel like I'm going to die" (stay in bed all day, pull down the shades or let your family and friends cater to your every whim) and your subconscious mind will happily follow that route also." -- excerpt from the upcoming book "Choices-Intend to Choose". |
First, My Situation Before I document all the challenges I address daily....... I want to also document that creating this page is the most difficult task I've addressed in a very, very long time. I feel like I'm sabotaging myself by offering my subconscious mind additional ammunition to control my body. All of my understandings, all of my most revered beliefs and most of the past twenty plus years have shown me that words have power. Documenting those words here makes them even more powerful, but unfortunately that is what I need to do. Anyone who has read any of my writing knows this is my thought process. They also know my thought process has worked incredibly well for me for quite awhile and I would rather not be challenging that process now. But this is quite important, so... I am documenting my various symptoms online, as doing so may help some people understand my path and, in turn, find it easier to relate to my concepts, opinions and attitude. If you can take away one thing from any of my writing and find it helpful, we will all benefit. Intentional or not, you will then pass on positive energy moving forward. -Tom |
This is my situation as it pertains to employment and disability: For clarity, I will note my situation and my hesitancy , regarding committing to scheduled employment with an employer expecting specific results on a continuous basis. It's important to understand the symptoms/challenges documented below dramatically vary from day to day. As an example, the first symptom explains I cannot stand for an extended period of time. Today I may be able to stand upright for ten minutes before needing to lean on something or sit down. Tomorrow I may have to continuously lean against a wall or just remain sitting. I cannot stand for an extended period of time. I cannot sit upright for an extended period of time. I typically experience spasticity after sitting (even reclined or relaxed for just a very short period of time). I cannot walk for an extended distance. I have limited strength that exhausts quickly. Any dignified coordination is now, a thing of the past. My body reacts dramatically to extremes in temperature. Above 76 degrees and fatigue quickly sets in (including a slower thought process). Less than 70 degrees and I will start to shake and become emotionally irritated. I require continuous and unrestricted access to restroom facilities. I am ambulatory, but often require aid of a cane. Without a cane, I will balance by touching walls, furniture etc. I have extreme difficulty with ramped/slopped surfaces and steps. I present with the pseudobulbar affect (inappropriate reactions when addressing emotional or serious issues. i.e. crying or laughing to excess.). All the above mentioned symptoms effect my comfort and I can get around all of them to provide a quality service to an employer. My last and newest symptom presents a problem I can't make allowances for and it wouldn't be correct to expect an employer to either. I'm now having intermittent cognitive thinking challenges. Memory, decision making, prioritizing and most importantly... mentally multitasking. Uninterrupted focus in now a requirement for me to accomplish most things. I have always worked in management or addressed outside business to business relations. Working in management or outside representation allowed me to address my physical limitations and still accomplish any required goals or expectations consistently. Now with the cognitive challenges , those options aren't really appropriate anymore.
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